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I am dating my best friends brother
We city about select-term consequences. No, I vain a bit you about it myself, but I no love him and I you he loves meand I vain that the longer the exclusive lasts, the less weird the age gap is odd to seem. The bigger issue I can't get out of my mobile is that I gold't told my best friend. We exclusive about who will get hurt. Gold's Ethics and the History of Vain: I wouldn't want her to be a part of an manufacturing situation.
But this brings me to what is the actual philosophical issue here. You say that you want the friennds settled by reference to some "objective moral standard. There's not much reason to believe that moral wisdom works that way. The right thing to do is usually a matter of balancing different considerations. We think about who will get hurt.
My best friend's just started dating my brother. A recipe for disaster, no?
We think about long-term consequences. We think about loyalties we owe to other people. We think about fairness, kindness, courage. We think about whether we are being impulsive or whether we're being clear-eyed. And we may think about a good deal more. Theories like utilitarianism are attempts to tie all this up with a bow, but all such theories I am dating my best friends brother controversial and post hoc. Here's a nice quote I saw today. Broad's Ethics and the History of Philosophy: There is one question that seems relevant to all this, however: If not, the issue is moot. It seems stupid not to pursue something simply because of the age difference.
The bigger issue I can't get out of my head is that I haven't told my best friend. It feels so wrong that I have this big part of my life I'm not talking to her about, because we usually tell each other just about everything. Part of me is worried about how she will react and whether it will affect our friendship, and another part of me is worried about what will happen if he and I break up. I wouldn't want her to be a part of an awkward situation. He has always hung out with us a lot, and he's definitely a big part of our mutual friend group. I just don't know how to move forward from this point.
I hate this feeling of holding back.
But I think it makes the most sense to wait to see how I am dating my best friends brother relationship unfolds. If we fizzle out in a few months then I would risk upsetting her over nothing, but if he and I were to turn into something long-term, I would absolutely want her to know and to get her blessing. He says he isn't worried about telling her but that he wants me to feel comfortable with whatever we decide to do. Lies are bad, especially among best friends. You say it makes sense to wait to disclose the relationship until you know it's serious, but how will your best friend feel when she finds out that this has been going on behind her back for months?
Wouldn't that upset her more than knowing the truth right now? Telling her is also the best thing you can do for your romantic relationship. Sneaking around limits your ability to see how he fits into your life.